goodbye reflection

to the mirror that formed out of the need 

for touching a wound in me 

externalized 

you appeared like an illusion

with hair the texture of earth,

skin the scent of wild sage, the kindest place

for a heart to beat, passed down 

palms of a grand

mother healer 

to the mirror that allowed me to see

a disheveled face, the brows 

of a father i could never name

in you, beloved - because of whom my heart

would race with fear, because of whom

a deeper heart opened inside the wound

wild and yearning for more -

an insignificant rock
longing for me

to the mirror that reflected unconditional

acceptance of whoever i turned out to be

when the masks i wore 

even to myself (how well one learns to lie 

in the face of learned and easy
helplessness - so i learn now inside the poem: being a child
is not the same as having no power)

wore off - a mirror that could not sustain 

the illusion reflected back -

a non-body 

how i wanted to see 

myself in you

instead i touched a ground, hard and true

mirror of my own creation
a desire not to see

kin 

in my native tongue 

circles kindness like a prayer gone extinct - 

wishing well, water waves spreading like a mirror, 

open arms, an embrace, breaking breaking

out of pain into forgiveness

to the reflection that scattered me 

all over a finite horizon, colored me in dusk -
told the sun to set without speaking,
told the beloved nothing of why
we must or we do
part ways